One of the first things I do whenever I check on my blog is to look at the blog stats. I am saying this not merely as a statement of fact, but as a confession. I am amazed at how easily I am lured into keeping score.
Oh, I can rationalize (and how!) that it’s no sin to be informed as to one’s own blog traffic. But my emotions betray my true motivation: I am excited when I see that the number of views is up, and I am disappointed when the number is down. Already I have begun to evaluate my self-worth (at least in part) by the popularity of my blog. Already I am tempted to make decisions as to how I will manage this blog based on what effect it will have on my traffic. Already it’s all about me.
This weekend the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy was playing on the TV at my house. These movies do a masterful job of illustrating the effect of temptation on people and on all of their relationships and activities — a masterful job of showing me myself. No one has ever offered me anything like the Ring of Power, but I have seen glimpses of what I would become if someone did. It isn’t pretty.
Lead us not into temptation, Lord, but deliver us from evil. For Thine – and not mine – is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory forever. Amen.
April 7, 2008 at 9:14 pm
Maybe blogging is like sending radio messages into outer space and hoping that someone out there replies.
I think your blog stands out from much of the noise out there in space because yours is not a self-centered rant. It contains the writings of a modest and thoughtful man.
I suspect that the blogs with the most traffic are those engaged in the culture war - the ones where people say very rude things to each other. Everyone seems to like a good fight.
April 8, 2008 at 12:26 pm
Thanks for your kind words, Ken. It is affirming to “stand out” and be called “modest and thoughtful,” and I certainly crave affirmation. I have been pleasantly surprised to learn that there are many blogs out there that are not so combative, although I agree that many popular blogs seem to be characterized by rudeness or lack of substance — or both. I don’t want mine to be like that, but I feel the tug on my ego.
Jesus had huge crowds following Him around — over 5,000 sat and listened to Him preaching at one point. But His focus was never on His own popularity; His focus was always on His Father’s will. I hope and pray that if I ever have 5,000 people viewing this blog I will be able to focus on God’s will. For now it’s probably a mercy that I am not in the spotlight.
April 8, 2008 at 1:08 pm
i get the mercy comment. sometimes i wonder if blogging is just another chance for me to lead someone or something astray. i have been loose with my mouth on it a few times. i have had to erase some posts. i have had to apologize for what gets lost in translation (to me that’s the worst b/c the offended might never call me on something and then there’s unresolved seperation).
but for all of the negatives, it lets my grandma see and know all of me, it keeps me and my long distance friends connected, and it keeps the daily lives of those i love fresh in my prayer/heart.
blog stats follow a cadence more than a balance. but so does my blog, my life. its always good to weigh motivation, so in that way, it’s another opportunity to keep things in check. if i can’t say it to my grandma, i probably shouldn’t say it at all.
thanks for letting me weigh and share my perspective.
April 10, 2008 at 10:33 pm
I really appreciate your vulnerability here. I have done and continue to do much of what you have confessed. I’ve never thought of it like managing ‘the ring.’ That seems like a good analogy, although I’m afraid I have already turned into a Gollum (sp?)
April 18, 2008 at 1:29 pm
I must confess that I am addicted to my own statistics. Sometimes addicted to their bigness but more often to their mediocrity. Thanks for the post.
April 18, 2008 at 8:10 pm
oooo, i check my stats all the time. when they’re down i wonder what i’ve done wrong - silly i know. anyway, i’ll click in more to raise your numbers!
April 25, 2008 at 2:41 pm
melanie-pearl, I like the way you say it: “blog stats follow a cadence more than a balance.” It is interesting to see that being absent from my blog for two whole weeks hasn’t affected that cadence much.
No, I haven’t repented of looking at my stats. But just confessing my self-centered attitude about it has helped me to approach it in a healthier way — for the moment, anyway.